Thought spew

Today the Facebook status prompt said, "What's on your mind?"

I had no idea what to write.

But that's not for lack of material. More because there's so much going on in my mind right now that I don't even know where to start. So I decided to let my mind spew forth onto my blog in the hope that it would bring a little order to my thoughts.

So now, presenting in no particular order of importance, my thoughts for the past few days:

• We're thinking about buying some property here to build on. It's 40 acres, with only about 12 of them buildable; the rest is a hill and it borders public state-owned land. We could run cows on it and build our personal dream home. We might be able to get a beginner rancher loan for it. We could get a rural land loan. We don't have any money for a down payment. Can we afford this and our rent and our student loans? Yes, but on a tight budget. It's an option. Could we actually get a loan from anyone for just land? Don't know.
• There are a ton of houses for sale, and a lot of them are really, really nice. Do we just buy a house instead of taking the time to build one? We are both capable remodelers and it would be easier to get a rural home loan with no down payment. 
• Do we buy another car? There have been over a dozen times since we've moved here that we have lamented not having a truck. If we get another vehicle I want it to be big enough to fit our entire family in it comfortably. I want it to be my get around vehicle. Do I want my "car" to be a quad-cab, 3/4 ton truck? That's what Jeremy wants, and I'm sick of driving our tiny car around with the car seats and Tayvin kicking the back of the chair b/c he has so little leg room. Do we get a light SUV instead that gets better gas mileage? Do we just make do and wait? 
• Tayvin got in trouble yesterday for throwing something because he was made that I turned the TV off. I'm trying to teach him that the TV is not worth throwing tantrums over and that throwing/hitting/kicking when we're angry is unacceptable. I sent him to his room, explained why, and he got a timeout. I felt like a great mom b/c I didn't yell or lose my temper. I was totally calm about disciplining him. Then when I went in to talk more about why he had a timeout I asked, "Do you know why we don't hit?" He replied, "Because I'll get in trouble." I almost started to cry. I felt like a failed parent. He had no idea why it was wrong to hit and throw and kick at things. Looking back it's easier to realized, 'Duh, he's 3!' But it was a little devastating, especially since I had been feeling so good about myself. Life right now is about taking it a day at a time.
• I can't find my camera battery chargers anywhere. We have two because I lost the original one when we were in Idaho. After we moved to Washington we found both of them and Jeremy put them somewhere so we wouldn't lose them again. Haha.
• Brooke is 3 months old and can roll over onto her tummy from her back! She's done it several times now, so I know it wasn't a fluke. She also wiggles and turns herself around at night.I go to get her in the morning and she has turned around 180 degrees.
• For the first time in a long time I feel really happy about like. I like where we are, we have income to get some of the things we want and to start saving up. I feel more relaxed and find it easier to be patient with Tayvin. Not all the time, but a whole heck of a lot more than when we lived in Georgia and Idaho. Maybe it's just breast-feeding hormones, but whatever it is, it feels great.
• I am really frustrated by the abortion debates going on in politics right now. Any woman who has ever born a child and is for abortion is a hypocrite. Abortion is intentional death, which is murder, and babies are babies, whether in the womb or out. I cannot imagine how anyone can see otherwise without deluding themselves.
• I'm ready for fall and winter. Summer is my least favorite season, it's way too hot. Not nearly as bad as Savannah, but still not fun to be out in.
• My teeth are in horrible shape from this last pregnancy. Brushing my teeth made me nauseous and made me throw up a lot, so I got out of the habit. Nasty, I know. And my teeth are paying the price for it now. I've had nightmares about my teeth falling out. Creeeepy.
• The fish tank got set up a couple weeks ago and the two angelfish I bought for it died. :( The two platies are still alive, but I got them just to have some color. I would have rather seen them die than my angelfishes.
• Brandon Sanderson is my favorite author ever. I'm working on reading every book he has ever written, and I'm almost done with the list. I finally bought my own copy of The Way of Kings, which is the longest book I have ever finished, and the only book I've ever wanted to read again right after I finished it.
• I'm learning to like zucchini. I made zucchini pasta with spaghetti and roasted tomatoes in a light cream sauce and it wasn't too bad. My chocolate zucchini bread (cake) recipe rocks.

And that's it for now.